Meeting Topic

Know what you want to get the opportunities you deserve by Justine Storey

Opportunities are everywhere. Truly they are.

Do you ever wonder why some people seem so lucky – always having opportunities fall into their lap – when you feel like this never happens to you and the opportunity is never there in front of you?

As the saying goes, ‘You make your own luck’.  That’s because luck is about putting yourself in the position where the opportunity you want is available to you. THE KEY IS KNOWING WHAT IT IS YOU WANT. Without this information, the best opportunity in the world could be right in front of you and chances are you won’t see it.

Our brains do so much work behind the scenes – and helping us to recognise opportunities is just one of the amazing ways it works.

I call it the ‘yellow car syndrome’.

When we say, “I want to buy a new car”, our brain says, “Thanks – great plan. Let me know when you see one you like, and I’ll get to working out if that’s the right one for us”. And not much happens. You might stumble across the car you want but chances are time will pass and there won’t be a new car in the driveway.

However, if you say “I want to buy a new car, and it has to be yellow” then suddenly everywhere you go you see yellow cars. Our brains are going “Hey there’s one! Is that the one we want?” Our mind recognises an opportunity when it appears and is pointing it out to see if it’s the one we want.

The real key to this though is knowing what you want. Without this vital bit of information, how will you ever be able to identify the opportunities in front of you? When you know exactly what you want, it changes the conversations you have with others, or the points you pick out of an article, or your approach to a problem. It moves you from blindly going about your day, to having your brain ticking away in the background assessing each situation – essentially on the hunt for those ‘lucky’ opportunities.

So what does this look like?

When I’m working with a client looking to change careers, the conversation goes from:

“I want to change career, but I don’t know what I want to do.”

To

“I’m looking for new opportunities that focus on doing these things that are really important to me.”

That works just the same for any of us in business.

For example, if the aim is to have more money in the account by the end of the year, the conversation goes from:

“I want to make more money in 2023.”

To

“I’m looking for opportunities to increase the profitability of my business.”

The difference is there can now be multiple opportunities for that to happen. More sales, price reviews, new markets, better systems, collaborations, better marketing – the list goes on.

The second statement invites discussion, the first – well that just has us all nodding going “Yeah, me too!”  When you think about what you want, it is not about focusing on the outcome (making more money) it is being open to thinking creatively about how you get there.

To find out more about how Justine helps her clients through her business Orange Fox, visit her website: www.orangefox.co.nz  or email her justine@orangefox.co.nz

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Intro to next meeting tropic:

As the saying goes, ‘You make your own luck’.  That’s because luck is about putting yourself in a position where the opportunity you want is available to you. THE KEY IS KNOWING WHAT IT IS YOU WANT. Without this information, the best opportunity in the world could be right in front of you and chances are you won’t see it. So this week, let’s see how much ‘luck’ we can generate for each other by putting out there what you WANT in your 1-minute intro!

Next Meeting Topic

Introduction to Meeting Topic:

Procrastination can affect us in any area of our life. Often, we are focused and motivated in some areas but not others. Some common examples of procrastination are: putting off a particular work task, not planning nutrition or other personal care, not making an appointment with a doctor or dentist, or neglecting home maintenance. Any of these can have serious consequences if put off for too long.

There are actually four main reasons for procrastination; understanding which of these is affecting you (or your staff or family) will open the door to positive change. As you prepare for this week’s 60-second introduction, read the article below and consider sharing something you regularly procrastinate over AND which of the 4 causes you think it is tied to. If you’re feeling bold, share how you will better manage it in future!

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Procrastination:  Why put off till tomorrow what you can do next month? by Camilla Watson

Sometimes thought of as laziness or self-sabotage, not doing what we actually know is ‘the right thing’ has several diverse causes. Only when we uncover the emotional cause behind the particular procrastination can take the first step required for change.

Procrastination can affect us in any area of our life and usually we are focused and motivated in some areas but not others. Some common examples of procrastination are: putting off a particular work task, not planning nutrition or other personal care, not making an appointment with a doctor or dentist, or neglecting home maintenance. Any of these can have serious consequences if put off for too long.

There are actually four main reasons for procrastination; understanding which of these is affecting you (or your staff or family) will open the door to positive change.

Understanding the REAL causes of procrastination:

1. “I don’t know how.” (lack of knowledge or understanding)
   1. When we don’t have the ability, skills or knowledge (or perceive we don’t) it is difficult to begin.
   2. A strategy to manage this challenge is to acquire the knowledge, maybe breaking the task into several manageable pieces and learning as you go.
2. “I’m afraid.” (fear, anxiety; of the ‘doing’ OR of the consequences)
   1. This can be caused by fear of the actual activity itself, fear of the direct consequences, or fear of the possible future consequences.
   2. Managing fear requires analysis of the REAL risk as compared to the PERCEIVED risk, and a strategy to ensure safety – which may require learning new skills. It is possible we don’t actually ‘know how’ and this is driving our fear. It is also possible our fear is a warning that this really is not a good idea.
3. “I’m right.” (sense of entitlement or superiority, maybe to make ‘the other’ wrong)
   1. This can be linked to the desire to be independent, but sometimes can lead to childish behaviour and not listening to the wisdom of others. It can also be driven by a subconscious desire to be seen as different – to our parents, to the mores of our upbringing, or our peers. Am I trying to prove my parents/peers/society wrong? Can I choose to stop making this about others and instead make a decision to act in my own best interest regardless of what another may think?
4. “I don’t want to.” (refusal, irresponsibility)
   1. As adults we all choose our behaviour; however, being ‘adult’ (ie: responsible and able to look after and provide for ourselves) carries certain responsibilities. Ask yourself the following:

• • • Where is the resistance coming from?
    • Do I really not want to do this, AND am I prepared to accept the consequences?
    • Do I need to accept responsibility for my life and my choices and take action, even if the action is difficult or painful?
    • How can I motivate myself? Do I respond best with the motivation of a positive ‘carrot’ or a negative ‘stick’?

To start creating a clearer 2023, choose one thing you regularly procrastinate on. Identify it clearly, and decide which of these four causes is the best fit. Commit to a management strategy – including a timeline.

Camilla is a counsellor, behavioural specialist, and Heal Your Life coach. She offers a range of services, in person and via Zoom, including her book ‘The Life You Want – Overcoming Anxiety, Stress and Depression’. Find out more at: www.corlight.co.nz

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