We ALL have self doubts – it’s not just you! Where things start to truly suck is when those voices of self doubt take over and get in the way of your success; of you living the life you want.
It’s important to identify the difference between thoughts that get in your way, and those that are trying to keep you safe from actual, real, this-could-kill-me danger. Let’s start by getting clear on WHY we have self-doubting – and self-sabotaging – thoughts.
When your brain is working to keep you safe, it’s trying to help save you from literal death, such as freezing on the spot so that mountain lion doesn’t spy you and eat you. Yes, this is a cave-folk time example – because that is what our brains evolved to help us with: literal survival. Our civilization has evolved so rapidly that we don’t have the need for our brain to function like that on the daily anymore. Generally speaking we don’t tend to run into mountain lions on the way to the local cafe.
Our brains developed to help keep us alive, but nowadays we have comparatively cushy lives, so that function of our brain is running on unchecked overdrive searching for danger, trying to be helpful and hunting for things to save us from. Hence negative, unhelpful thoughts.
Now we’re clear on WHY this happens, let’s look at getting you out of being stuck in the Fear Zone.
One powerful way to help you stop being stuck in the Fear Zone is by focusing on WHY you do what you do, and WHO you do it for.
This works, because when you feel deeply connected to your Why, and set that at the core of everything you do, then it becomes not about you – it’s all about helping others, helping the world to be a better place.
Start by asking yourself some helpful, quality questions.
Doing this as a written exercise is important – getting those thoughts out of your heads and down onto paper is scientifically proven to work.
- What do I feel filled with energy and passion about? What makes me feel expansive and charged up?
- What do I know, what have I learnt? What am I good at and love to do?
- What do I see missing in the world? How can I help others?
- Who do I want to help the most? Describe these people.
- Circle the things that make you feel the most charged up. What activities might this result in you doing?
- What might this look like if you were paid for it? What might you incorporate into your mahi – Put this together into a sentence so you are super clear on your Why.
- Remind yourself of your Why every day.
Many people make the mistake of letting FEAR get in the way of doing what is best for them, their business – and their clients – by not showing up.
Once you place your focus on your WHY, your self-doubts will fall away – you will no longer be afraid to take action, because you are doing this for a mission bigger than you.
Bonus: A tip to help you get more ideal clients to want to do business with YOU!
Because you will be radiating clarity of purpose, people you want to work with will be attracted to you like magnets.
I have a whole lot of tips and tools to help you bust your self doubts and gain inner-confidence. My free mini online workshop is coming up in Quarter 1 2023. Find out more and get on the waitlist now: www.tabithaarthur.com/unlock-inner-confidence
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