Fear is an interesting emotion.
It’s one we are expected to grow out of as we grow up, and as adults we don’t often discuss our fears or the things that scare us.
In reality, fear is often holding us back from doing the things we want to do – whether we are aware of it or not.
This article is all about learning how to manage your fears – or doing it scared.
- Don’t fight your fears – make friends with them.
We are often directed to fight our fears and slay our dragons. I like to take a different approach! Let’s ride our dragons instead and make friends with our fears. Acknowledge the fear when it shows up, name it and check if this is an old friend – one you have dealt with before – or is this a new one?
- How is this fear serving you?
Our mind is very clever, it is geared to protect us and ensure our survival. It does this by making us aware of danger or harm and fear is one of its mechanisms. Usually this fear is unfounded, but it can be hard to tell the difference. Once you have acknowledged your fear ask it “How are you serving me?”.
- Did fear get stuck in your body?
Sometimes fear can get stuck in our body, rather than coming from our mind. Think of this scenario – your mind sends a signal of danger and then the dangerous thing happens. In the future, when the mind signals this particular danger the body generates an overreaction, based on the remembered event. Your body had generated a trauma response based on the alert. Here’s an example:
I’m scared of cows.
Not because they present a threat to me, but because of an event that occurred in the past. Understanding that this is not a current threat, but a remembered threat helps me to manage my fear of cows. I can use that reminder to keep myself in the present moment rather than falling into the fear from the past.
- Do it scared.
You can acknowledge the fear, understand it and also understand why it is impacting you, but the key is not letting it stop you from doing what you want.
Being scared doesn’t diminish what you are doing. Invite your fear to come along for the ride. You can build your courage and bravery muscles, not by pretending you aren’t scared, but by doing it scared. The emotion of fear is just a data signal from either your brain or your body – you get to choose how you use that signal.
If you want to hear the story behind my fear of cows, or would like to learn more about me and what I do – jump on my Venus profile and use the link to book a RAVE. I would love to hear from you. https://www.venusbusinesswomen.co.nz/profile/rebeccastone_lifecoach